Saturday 15 December 2018

Orgasm controlled

so as i sit here day 6 of chastity, my mind switches to my last session of 2018 with Miss next week and thoughts on what She has in store for me.

She has mentioned sub state, which She well and truly put me in last time and it was super awesome so ill be intrigued by that!

Also what are Her plans for my orgasm, if any....? Pretty much everyone one this year has been ruined by Miss. Either by forcing it, making me eat it, post orgasm torture including ball punches and forcing a second without a break, or by edging me a painful amount of times before removing Her hand at the point of no turning back. All either painful or humiliating, or both.

So my thoughts are what will it be next week....?

Btw she even controls them remotely from distance in the same manner. They are well and truly owned by Miss Suzanna.

Friday 7 December 2018

December domestic filming

So earlier on this year i was honoured enough for Miss Maxwell to ask me to film as a sub for Her in some domestic setting clips. That filming day was yesterday.

In a fun day of filming. W/we shot 3 clips and i filmed Miss in action with another sub (black sheep) in another 4. In between filming Miss allows a fairly relaxed atmosphere, but leaves you in no doubt of Her dominance with occasional reprimands such as ball squeezes throughout the day. Of course She is attended to as She requires with refreshments and assistance with menial tasks also.

So, more than 24 hours later and my - or more relevant - Miss Suzanna's balls are still aching. In the very first clip, She dished out some very painful ball busting and all whilst i was chastised. i can say no more until She chooses to release the clip, but i was proud to suffer for Her and capture that suffering on film.

Filming as a sub is totally different from a session - and i love both. With filming, you dont get the intensity of session play, but you do get to learn a little about Miss in the breaks, and clearly the pain is dished out as you would expect..;) i know not of what i am going to be required to film, again this matters not to me as i totally trust my Mistress - She knows me so well now and She is an exceptional reader of people.......do not underestimate this point....!!;)

my next meeting with Miss is as accompaniment with Her to Bitches Unleashed...something i am honoured to have been invited to do. i have been allowed to accompany Her to BU once before, and thoroughly enjoyed it....this time however, will be in different circumstances.....

The main one being, W/we now know each other a lot more due to my total devotion and servitude to Her throughout this year.

Secondly She owns me, there is no doubt about that any longer from my point of view and She is vocal about it to. As such i need to continue my learning at the event, i dont want to let Her down and i dont want to cramp Her style...its tough this devotion deal...;)

Also i will know a lot of the Mistresses there - Ladies who i admire and respect. i hope to have conversations with them but obviously my heart and soul will be with my Mistress, at Her feet or at Her service, whichever She chooses.



Monday 29 October 2018

Thank You Miss Suzanna.....and just 1 reason why She is awesome


Just a quick blog to both thank and praise the wonderful Miss i am devoted too.

Firstly, i appreciate the help She allows me to give in order to make Her life better and/or easier. i am honoured and privileged to be allowed to carry out these duties for Her.

Secondly, at the start of our devotion Miss set some rules, no contract just rules and expectations. i have tried very hard to follow these, and largely i feel i have succeeded. It was a very demanding start to the devotion, probably as Miss got a grip of me and tested me, maybe we have settled into a more serene phase of the devotion now. For how long is Her call....you know that..;)

Anyway i digress. For the first time in our journey i felt the need to ask for deviation from the expectations. i pondered this decision very carefully. i did not want to upset or confuse our connection. i did ask and received a favourable response, but more importantly than the answer yes was Her unequivocal compassion and concern for me. She need not have worried....but She absolutely did and that was Her biggest driver...Miss Suzanna You are wonderful...xx

i cannot see me asking for deviation again, as i truly, truly love being devoted to MSM....xxx

Finally for now, i may do a 'whats it like to be slave flash' soon....from a submissive, devoted males point of view....well, at least mine anyway..;) x

Sunday 21 October 2018

An ode to Miss Suzanna

A little ditty in honour of my Mistress.....:)

Here i write about my favourite person,
Who, if She left my life, it would worsen.
A cruel, sadistic, tornentative Miss,
Devotion to Her is truly bliss.

One brief meeting in Manchester one day
Was all that it took for me to think “OK”
slave flash you need to get this deal booked,
From that day forward, i am truly hooked.

A journey was planned to earn a collar,
The tapestry of my life She will encolour.
i’m now totally addicted to Miss Suzanna
A talented Domina who plays the piana😁

Latex, denim, leather or lace,
Miss always has style, elegance and grace,
A regal Domina with class to spare,
Drives my desire to worship and care.

Long blonde hair and blood red lips
Legs of perfection and real nice….boobs😊
With a body to die for and a brain to suit
Beautiful face which makes the boys toot.

With a sadistic nature and razor sharp tongue,
Any slave cockiness doesn’t last long,
Beauty and brain’s She uses all day
Submission and servitude the only way.

With a love of torment, denial and tease,
Effortlessly making me eager to please,
Distance control or with Her in person,
Her knowledge and imagination, a bottomless caisson.

When there in person, She is at Her peak
By contrast to Miss, my resistance is weak
All sessions with Her are a true delight
my desire to submit, i just cannot fight.

With the ability to be cruel, harsh and kind,
She effortlessly twists the meek male mind
Normally hard but sometimes mild,
The beating of males, drives Her wild.

The use of the cane, the whip, or crop
Keeps me in check & Miss Suzanna on top,
With beatings inevitable to keep Her happy,
i take it for Her, so She is not crappy.

Hits to the balls and hits to the bum
Hits to the cock for an early cum,
Strikes with the crop and blows with the cane
There is no-one better at inflicting some pain.

Torture of balls, nipples and cock,
Edged to frustration, no watching the clock
Using Her knees, heels or kicks
It’s a joy to crumple at Her feet in bits.

Slapping, spitting, pegging, using a needle
Chastity, control, made to feel feeble,
No choice in my torment, its totally Her call
i have no fears here, She excels at them all.

As much as i adore always thinking of You,
i'm sure You have something kinky to do,
With that note i too must dash
Warmest regards, from Your slave flash.

Monday 8 October 2018

Session 9 review

So it's session 10 with Miss Suzanna tomorrow....ive been 8 days in chasity and 8 days without release...thats 190 hours or 2.18% of 2018 (i wonder what %age of the year i have been in chastity in total...??).

Anyway i plan a blog about the moving and differing mindsets when in chasity - now its just an ache - like they are bruised - and im very aware, like they are swollen......im also very horny and frustrated, and i still have one more no cum worship to do tonight!

So, my first ever review of a session is up on Miss' website, and now here for you to read. Hopefully i'll do a review of each session going forward on this marvellous journey....enjoy:



i nervously waited in my car for my Mistress to summons me to this double session with Her and Her gorgeous blonde friend Miss Marks. What was instore for me, remained a mystery

Miss Suzanna Maxwell opened the entrance door shortly after i had knocked. As i entered i could not fail to see and admire Her in Her lovely black lingerie - heels, stockings suspenders, kickers and bra  - She knows lingerie is a big weakness of mine.

Miss lead the way up the stairs, giving me an enchanting view of Her perfect ass inches from my face as i followed Her in a trance up the stairs to my date with destiny.

Once in the dungeon, Miss Marks joined us, also in black lingerie - Miss Marks going for multi-strap suspenders to keep Her stockings up and a basque on top. i was in double blonde and black heaven.

After the brief formalities, Miss Suzanna told me they were leaving and i was to strip and await their return. i did this and assumed the greeting position that is required.

Not long passed before i heard the delightful sound of heels and the door opening. Miss Suzanna's perfect feet appeared in front of me and i greeted Her with kisses to each foot, before Miss Marks presented Her beautiful feet for the same worship.

"up on your feet arms out" Miss commanded. As i presented my wrists, the two Ladies cuffed me and clipped me to the suspension unit above. i was now naked, hung and at their mercy.

Miss Suzanna left the room and swiftly returned with a glass tumbler, at the same time as She began playing with my flaccid penis, She informed me i was going to cum in the cup and then drink it.

Now i had been in chastity for 9 days, and the thought of me swallowing my own heavy, 9 day old load resonated. However, with Miss's relentless action and the visions of blonde and black loveliness filling my eyes my thoughts drifted as my milking continued.

There was no choice for me here, i was going to be forced to cum then i was going to have to eat it. As Miss's rhythmic handiwork brought me inevitably closer i asked for permission to cum. It was the fastest i had ever been granted, Miss was clearly keen to see my humiliation!

As i started to ejaculate, Miss cruelly stopped Her wanking of me, ruining my orgasm to boot.....agony, but my pitiful thoughts on this lasted only as long as it took Miss hand returned to my cock to ensure She had fully emptied me.

She quickly presented the cum filled glass opened my mouth and poured that 9 days worth of cum into me-  "swallow it" She barked. Miss Marks's equally as skilled hand returned to my cock and She began some sensitive post orgasm wanking - for a second i thought i was to be forced to cum again, as i know that is in Miss' arsenal.  Thankfully Miss left my cock alone as both Mistress broke down into giggles and laughter at my humiliating start to the session, and clear grimace on my face.

Miss defined my harsh and ruined milking as pleasure: therefore following pleasure must come pain.

Still helplessly strung up, both Mistresses then began to flog me, taking in turns to create the sound on my back they so love. i can’t remember how many lashes i took before they switched implements to the crop, then finally to a whip. Miss pushed me yet again in Her whipping of me which i took for Her.

Following this, Miss turned Her attentions to my balls. She is a deadly accurate ball buster, and instructing me to turn round so i could not see Her coming and spread my legs. Her first kicks connected with my testicles from behind me and the pain shot into my stomach - cruelly made worst by me not being able to cradle them following the kick....!

Miss Marks was invited to kick me which She did with accuracy too then both of these stunning Women took turns to smash by poor, empty balls in a barrage of kicks. With my arms aloft i could not defend my assets from the exquisite pain even if i wanted too.

With my balls tenderised and both Mistresses happy i was let down and i was allowed to kiss the feet that had just hurt me, before i was cocooned in the inflatable slug!

This was another first for me and delivered so well by my Mistress. As the air filled the bag, i simply could not move. The rubber was all encapsulating, and with only small little holes to breath through i could not see a thing. Of course i was aware of the two blonde Mistresses that we’re circling me, but i couldn’t anticipate their next move, but simply lie there and accept my fate.

It was difficult to tell what was happening....i “think” my cock was exposed some how and that it was  toyed with, i was certainly aware of my Mistress’s face sitting - Her beautiful arse on my face, restricting the small amount of air i could breath, but not see Her was amazing.....and i was aware one of my tormentors sat on my waist....im not sure which one but they were tantalisingly close to me as i was all restricted.

Upon release from my cocoon, I was strapped to the bondage wheel...what a sight to see Miss Suzanna and Miss Marks in black lingerie strapping me in - my already weakened state was now fully exposed as i tried to take in as much of this visual treat as humanly possible....man it was heaven. Both Mistresses taunted me verbally, in sexy low tones before my Mistress exited the room leaving Miss Marks to continue my torment.

After a short time, my Mistress returned with a naked male slave collared, on a leash and on hes knees…i was resigned to my fate.

As Miss Marks provided some seductive words of encouragement, i could hear Miss Maxwell giving Her instructions and expectations to the slave – one of which was to swallow my load.

After giving Her final words, Miss lead the slave to my cock, and instructed him not to disappoint, whilst both Mistresses stepped back a little and watched as i endured this most humiliating act, solely in order to please Miss Suzanna.

Despite he’s best efforts the slave failed to get me hard…probable due to having the milking i received earlier coupled with the humiliation. Miss Suzanna, not renown for Her patience, released my right hand and instructed me to wank into the slaves open mouth. i commenced, at first choosing to continue to admire the view of these two Mistresses in front of me. As i became aroused i closed my eyes to focus my deviant thoughts and too deliver for my Mistress. Sinking into an immersive world i was soon releasing my second load of the afternoon into the mouth of the willing slave infront of me.

With the slave out of the way, the Mistresses released me for the final act of kissing Their shoes to end the session. This was my first forced bi experience, i did it only for my Mistress and in Her expert hands, maybe i will do it again in future. Maybe i was a little broken after it,  but as all the best people do, my Mistress has fixed me and I cannot wait to serve Her again in person  soon.

Regards

slave flash

Saturday 29 September 2018

edging

Miss Suzanna introduced me to the concept, the pain the pleasure of edging, that there is no doubt.

i had heard the term before, didnt know alot about it and certainly never experienced it, but it's just one of the items She has given me to which i am truly thankful.

On our very first session - before my total devotion and owned route - Miss ended the session by telling me She was going to edge me....i cannot recall the number but i'd guess it was 13 times...;) and it would have almost certainly ended ruined.

Miss is excellent at this, and just as it relies on me begging just at the right time for full effect, it also relies on Miss stopping or inflicting pain at the right time too.......and She excels at this...in fact i think W/we have only got it wrong one to date ...of course it was my fault and ending with several punches to the balls mid orgasm....that was painful i can tell you and it was caught on camera..;) - it has also given me an idea for a more extreme version of it....maybe that for another time..;)

Yes it would be easy for me to beg early and before the edge, but whats the point? i beg when i am at the edge, and it is that pain/pleasure moment. Its genuine and my fate is literally in the hand of my Mistress, to whom i trust totally.

Being repeatedly edged is painful obviously. It drains you, weakens you and commits you to a state of submissiveness rarely experienced. If you are totally restrained then that is another level and privilege again.

In O/our situation Miss controls me and takes control totally away from me. Its Her hand and my cock. i am truly honoured that it is this way round. If i were to edge myself, i would feel more in control, when Miss has my dicklet in Her hand then there is even less doubt who is in control. Even as i am begging and trying to hit the number i am given, it is Mistress's call if She wants to make me fail by ignoring me. That's Her prerogative.


Thursday 6 September 2018

one more sleep....

One more sleep until my frustrated and horny cock is out of its virtual chastity. For how long, and for what use i do not know, but one thing is for sure, Miss Suzanna will want me knelt naked infront of Her when i greet Her tomorrow.

i have no thoughts on what is in store for me tomorrow, i just know it will be pain for me and pleasure for Her, and my cock and balls will suffer their fair amount!

So, its 9 days since my last release.....well two releases actually as there were two on the same day. 1 was a forced and very ruined orgasm at the skill hands of Miss Suzanna the second, a few hours later was another forced orgasm, but this time She insisted i wanked myself in worship of Her stockings. Both times my disgusting mess was feed too me...yuk!

Since then i have been banned from touching. i have behaved, only touching my cock to pee, clean and shave, never so much a thought of touching in arousal.

It has been hard...Monday and today (Thursday) by far the hardest. i described Mondays pains in a previous blog, and today's are very similar, but today i have an almost irresistible urge to find a suitable image of Miss and totally misbehave.......but i will succeed and remain in my virtual chastity, or chastity of trust with no touching until i see my Mistress tomorrow.

The last 9 days have been difficult, but what it has done is ensure i think, dream and fantasise about my Mistress, which of course keeps me horny, submissive and subservient which of course is what She wants. She wants me to have Her always in my mind.....and She absolutely is.

This is also fraught with danger as the male mind is a little stupid not least when it's horny. So i have actively resisted needless random contact with Her, in order that i do not out stay my welcome and end up out of favour again.

So tomorrow is so finally nearly here, i just hope i perform as expected and do my Mistress proud...give Her some fun and laughter, amusement and pleasure at my predicaments and pain.

i may even consider are review of the session.....but of course only if Miss Suzanna Maxwell permits such scripture from me...xx


Monday 3 September 2018

How the mind works on the ban....

So this is my 5th day of my no touching ban and 6th day since I was allowed relief (ruined of course)......This puts pressure in all sorts of places.

Clearly, the most obvious place for pressure is as a result of the inevitable fluid build up, creating a noticeable swelling and pressure which drives a desire to release. Of course i am not only banned from release, but even a little playtime too.

The second place is in the mind. Any little downtime or gap in thinking about every day stuff is quickly filled with thoughts of my situation, my Mistress, the forthcoming session or indeed all three.

This thinking and fantasing not only adds more pressure to go for relief but also creates a desire to write things down - plans, fantasies, wishes etc. Of course bothering Mistress with unwanted and excessive communications as She goes about Her day is not a good plan. i actively speak when spoken to in this at the moment!! So, this blog format gives me that outlet and an opportunity to note my thinking as each day ticks over.

i have an appointent with Mistress on Friday - i genuinely do not know what is in store for me, as She  plans and delivers the sessions how She sees fit in order for my progression towards ownership. i do know it will be all of painful, fun, sadistic, fair, safe, mind blowing and more, it always is. Will i be allowed to cum or even forced to cum is totally Her decision, as is what happens after if i do get a release.

So as Friday approaches these thoughts and questions will play over and over, mixed with wishful thinking and certain fantasies will simply put me into a vicious circle of frustration and pressure. To which i am determined to succeed and not touch at all...:)

Saturday 1 September 2018

10 day wank ban

Thats right, im currently 3 days into a 10 day wank ban imposed by my Mistress Suzanna Maxwell.

my crime i hear you ask, was to cum on an edging count of 2 and not 13 as i was commanded to during a filming day on Wednesday.

Miss was not happy at my premature failure and issued this ban after beating my cock and balls post orgasm....that hurt.

Her initial sentence was 31 days! but then She realised i would be worshipping Her in session 10 days later so reduced my sentence to 10 days

Mistress has had me in chastity for prolonged periods from January this year, but this is my first ban on touching. i am still to worship Her each morning and each evening but not touch myself....it is hell now and we're only a 3rd in...:(

When one of the other subs who we were filming with realised i could not cum for 10 days he asked how i did this, as 3 days for him - and lets face it most males - is too long.

We fundamentally i have no choice, as Miss has instructed it. She has made me go 13 days before now which i have succeeded in doing, difference was i was at least allowed to touch each evening....this is a total ban.

So, pretty much 72 hours after my last very ruined orgasm, presumably i have another 240 hours to go.......i say presumably because im not even sure if Miss will allow my release when worshipping Her...??
She generally takes delight in painfully and repeatedly edging me before ruining the orgasm in various ways and She has hinted at multiple forced milking sometime soon.

Mistress will decide the fate of my ban and release and i am more than happy with this as i work towards my collar and ownership......this is if i can keep my hands off my cock for another 7 days......

Friday 29 June 2018

sorry about the lack of updates...i do need to try harder..;)

OK so i'm glad to know that Miss didnt keep me from orgasm from that day till this, in fact She allowed my release on day 13.

How She did it took me by complete surprise, and arguably provided me with my first public humiliation experience.

After treating Miss to a nice light lunch i was told i had to go to the toilet to release....and film it, so She could view it when i returned..as i walked to the toilet, hoping no-one else was in there i just felt small. i had to film it, i couldnt see my Mistress either in person or an image so i had to imagine, dream, reminisce....anything to drive that vision of beuaty that would drive my erection and ultimately release.....in a public toilet.

As i walked back from my deed feeling like the whole world knew what i had just done, Mistress simply asked for my phone so She could view it...........i felt small, humiliated, degraded but proud that i had done what my Mistress wanted, and pleased for Her that i excepted my training without expectation or question and with total trust She is my Mistress.

So, where am i with my training? Seven sessions in and i feel totally owned. i now just simply submit to Her. When i have the privileged of worshipping Miss in person, i know not of what i will be subjected to. Whats more, i dont care, im not worried about it as long i can worship Her, feel Her the pain She expertly deliveries and make Her happy then i am happy. i do know however that Miss's favourite is beating men for their pain and Her pleasure, so each session i fully expect (and have received) a harder beating than last time

Miss Suzanna can certainly deliver pain - Her whipping and caning skills are renown, and my levels are pathetically low.
Miss has taken up the challenge to train me, and each and every session i receive a beating - i mark easily which delights Her and i am always pushed to the edge of being broken, i force myself to take more and more for my Mistress.

Under Miss Suzanna's guidance, i have been subjected to many experiences - some new, some not, some off my fantasy list, some that push my limits - but all executed with skill, confidence, quality and class.

Long may this continue.

sf



Thursday 10 May 2018

Day 11 of no release.

11 days maybe considered by some as an eternity and others barely into their stint for me its teetering on the unknown again, as my record so far is 11 days...tomorrow Miss Suzanna once more breaks new ground with Her latest project.

Its strange how the ebb and flow of arousal goes when forbidden like this, this probably due to my trust in my Mistress and my choice to be honest.

im not in chastity and im not on a wank ban, in fact Miss requires me to  masturbate for a prescribed time each night which provides devotion. Occasionally this time is altered which not only adds frustration, but forces me to edge myself and then suffer the blue ball ache that follows prolonged erection without release. Of course my Mistress knows all too well the effects of Her remote, cruel ways.

As i sit here pondering i know not of when i will get the permission to ejaculate, neither do i seek to ask for permission as i will simply wait for Miss Suzanna to make Her choice known to me.

my Her balls feel full and heavy, it feels like She has a gentle grip around them all day, exerting a little pressure, likely from the 11 days of build up so far. Its not painful as such, but i am aware of it, aware that they are full and feel a lot heavier than im used to. im aware i cannot simply go home, select some suitable material and release the pressure......until i am told to do so. That is a nice feeling, frustrating, but nice.

Throughout my fledgling path to devotion, i have only been allow to cum once per week. Sometimes and definitely the week before i worship Miss in session, the permission is witheld and my orgasm is denied.

During my normal week long denial there is an raft of emotions. Generally Mondays are relaxed after release day, Tuesdays and Wednesday build back up the Thursday are a big test. For some reason giving me the urge to wank, and frustration that i cant. When pushed to go longer than a week, days 8, 9 and 10 generally are OK but it really reinforces my subservient and compliance together with constant thinking of Mistress, and ways to serve and please.

All of this goes to a wonderful connection with my Mistress and ratchets the desire to worship, obey, serve and please.



Tuesday 8 May 2018

Cum control

For the last 5 months i have been in no doubt that Mistress controls my orgasms. She controls when, where and how they are delivered. i have a regime that i willingly stick by that ensures Mistress is at the forefront of my thoughts before bedtime and as i wake, it works as i adore Her and are constantly thinking of ways to please Her.

This week i have have displeased my Mistress which was met with the expected, and indeed wanted punishment. The punishment handed out was no cumming until She decides. Normally, i am allowed release on a specific day of the week - i know what that day is and very look forward to my weekly climax. This week however is now very much different as i dont know when i will get the permission, to cum.....or even if i will get that permission this week.

As i sit and write this, pondering my situation i am under no illusion that i cannot cum on my specified day - which is Sunday - unless my Mistress instructs me

As i write this it has been 9 days now since release, obviously my balls are full and heavy, my worship regime tonight will ensure they ache too, and certainly ache for the instruction.

Just a few word from my compliant and frustrated situation i find myself in - i got my self into as i was weak and could not resist worship outside of my permitted times. This in itself is a very difficult task due to Mistress's total beauty but normally i control myself....some how. This time i failed now i have to wait patiently until Mistress instructs my release.......i hope it's not to many more days...x


Sunday 22 April 2018

\OK so im now some 4 months into devotion to Miss Suzanna, and what a start to this journey it has been. i'm definitely loving the new way.

The first challenge, was the instruction to follow a nightly routine - without question. This routine, is/was a total departure to my normal ways, and very different. Its purpose? to build the desire to worship Miss. It was and remains very effective.

Miss Suzanna is gorgeous, that is not in question, but the change from the session once in a while mindset to absolute devotion and round the cloak thinking needed to be made. Miss Suzanna recognised that from the start and set about that change with my new routine from day 1.

With devotion, came some unexpected challenges and changes. Firstly, and quite obviously really due to the meaning of devotion, i now have no need to watch the clips and films i have collected.....devotion to Miss is exactly that, so any worship will be to Miss S only.

Secondly, as distance is somewhat of a consideration, i need to plan my sessions, my personal worship time. This involves consideration, or re-consideration of other obligations that involve travel time during the working week, as i only have a set amount of that free time. So this first gets offered to Miss and Her needs and or desires as i do have a set of skills which are hopefully of use to Miss outside of personal worship time. If my Mistress chooses not to use them, then maybe i can use some of that time for myself....but its Miss S's first. During the latter 2 months of the journey, She has taken the options and has my time planned into July currently.

To say i wasn't really prepared for this level of time allocation would be a fair statement - but im totally committed, resolute and thinking about it as i have an absolute desire to please - whether that be as She chooses to use my time, or not as that please's Miss S too. my only objective is to please Miss Suzanna.

What this has achieved, together with the daily routine is to instil that 24 hour thinking about Mistress, and Her potential needs and desires, i merely try to provide that devotion She deserves.

im loving this change....

do i want to session with anyone else? No.

Are there Mistress's who i'd love to session with if i wanst now devoted to Miss S? Of course....there are some stunning Domina's i never got the chance with unfortunately.

do i want to worship Miss Suzanna daily? Yes if i could.

i love being owned by Her, working towards being collared and looking forward to Miss S turning more of my fantasies into reality....xxxx






Sunday 1 April 2018


Ok, so this blog is about the background to the start of my journey with Miss Suzanna Maxwell.


It is a long one – you may choose to read it, you may not. For those in hurry or not wishing to read my musings, the main point is that I’m pleased to announce as of February 2018 I began my devotion to Miss Suzanna Maxwell with the goal of working towards my collar.

Miss Suzanna and I had discussed this plan and its implications for a while now, first muting it back in the summer of 2017. We began its inception a few weeks ago and I have been pleased to be guided and corrected in my first two sessions on this path thus far.

So I will share some thoughts on this, some points are personal between Miss Suzanna and I and will remain so, other points some people may be interested in. Some points I’d just quite like to share on the web

I will try to address three points here. Why now? Why Miss Suzanna and what happens to my photography and filming? Going forward, I'd like it to be a kind of insight from an sub’s view in this journey.

Firstly, this is my first ever contemplation and journey into devotion. The vanilla world is good to me day to day  – I like the switch to the sub side and have not entered a sub/Domme relationship…..that doesn’t make me a bad person. It also doesnt mean that i would not seek and thrive in a sub/Domme relationship in the future should the opportunity arise.....who knows in this lovely kinky world i am discovering. 

I have been sessioning with pro Dommes since 1994, albeit in frequently – maybe 3 or 4 times per year. I have still suffered/enjoyed all manner of fetishes administered by a select bunch of Dominatrix. Some of these were sessions great, most were exquisitely brilliant & a few were mind blowingly astronomically amaze-balls.

In my sessioning todate I have met and sessioned with some wonderful and inspiring women.
Anyone who knows me knows how much respect I give to the dominant women.
I take this respect up a notch with certain people who, for a variety of reasons have given me a little more inspiration. Beit their professionalism, their trust in me before we met, their continued trust in me or simply the way they treat or have treated me – all above and beyond and outside of the session time.

Miss Suzanna is in the later described handful of people, and was from the very first time I met her. 

This was in a dungeon car park for a photoshoot in September 2016. Pretty much her first words to me – as I was on the phone concluding a business deal – was “I hate my photo taken, I have no idea how to pose and I you’ll have to tell me exactly what to do” all as she was hugging me and I was trying to finish my phone call. I had met Miss Suzanna Maxwell.

Anyway, we did the shoot – the results are well published – and we both concluded it a big success. We were to shoot a further two times after with equally impressive results. The connection was good.

It’s worth noting I have never, ever, done a photoshoot with an ulterior motive – those who know, know – my only goal is to ‘get the shot’.

Also of note is that until Club Pedestal November 2016, I had never been to…or really courted a fetish club. At Her request, and following just one shoot and one session, i was proud to accompany Miss Suzanna on that evening.

So, I have great connections - and friendships - with other beautiful Dommes…..……why Miss Suzanna?

This is a question I dont really have an answer for. I have discussed this with Suzanna Herself too,  neither of us can explain. My only answer to this is 'the connection' I feel towards Her. - and I know She feels the connection is mutual.This is over and above what is normal, and hence why its difficult explain. 

Yes, She is beautiful, funny, demanding, fair, compassionate, relentless, understanding, harsh, knowledgeable, a sadist and an true believer in Female domination.

Maybe during the coming months we can get a better explanation as to the answer to 'why Miss Suzanna', but for now thats all i can offer im afraid. 

So why now?

In my other hobby I have photographed more than 50 women of the dominant nature stretching back to my first shoot with Mistress Chatterley in 2010. 

This started and evolved from shooting glamour into a fairly uncontrollable fetish shooting beast in 2015 & 2016, putting me under pressure to shoot with people and in places that may or may not have been my choice.

I didnt like this out of control feeling, but loved the shooting Mistress'es idea so it was difficult to stop.

So, after more than 20 years of sessions and years of shooting i needed to do something different.

To be fair, I have had the craving to do something different for a couple of years now but unsure where my next direction should be, and having tried unsuccessfully to arty things up I took a back seat in 2017. 

Mid way through last year i had some inspiration...park all the wandering infrequent sessioning and shit shooting time/costs and concentrate on devotion to 1 Mistress with a goal of being collared.

There was no question who I would like to be collared by....if possible, if She would even consider me/it.

As I've said, I have some really good connections, with some really great Dommes, and elite faves after 20 years - but something prevented my approach, other than to Miss Suzanna - location, session availability, perception, time, reciprocation, maybe session activities too...

The first challenge I had here was the language. Having not been a lifestyle sub, I found the speak a little strange (after 20 odd years!!) and Im not sure I still fully understand it now....... but that is part of the learning.

What happens to photography?

It continues. Miss has made it perfectly clear that She approves of my photography hobby and She doesn't want me to stop.

It is also clear that I am not allowed to session with anyone else (obviously) which extends to clip filming activities, unless filmed with Miss Suzanna in attendance.

Photoshoot's are allowed and will continue until either I cannot sustain devotion and photography, or Miss S tells me otherwise...;)

So, they're you have it. I am by far a literary genius but I feel I have a story to tell and maybe this is the forum to tell it.

I'm some 2 months into it currently, and with 2 sessions done, correction administered, loads of firsts accomplished with Miss S and with a year of plans and targets fleshed out, my blogging will be more frequent and improve I'm sure.

Next time will be shorter, but describe the formative steps and maybe some detail of that first session under devotion.

take care

slave flash









New blog coming tonight, about the start of my journey with my mistress, Miss Suzanna Maxwell

Friday 30 March 2018

OK, so it's not my very, very first blog maybe my second or third - but it is my first one on this platform, and on the specific subject i want blog on about.

This blog is hopefully going to give me an outlet on some of my thoughts and musings as i commence/continue on a journey of devotion.

That journey is with a very special Lady, Miss Suzanna Maxwell, and my next post will just expand a little on the start of this direction for me.