So this is my 5th day of my no touching ban and 6th day since I was allowed relief (ruined of course)......This puts pressure in all sorts of places.
Clearly, the most obvious place for pressure is as a result of the inevitable fluid build up, creating a noticeable swelling and pressure which drives a desire to release. Of course i am not only banned from release, but even a little playtime too.
The second place is in the mind. Any little downtime or gap in thinking about every day stuff is quickly filled with thoughts of my situation, my Mistress, the forthcoming session or indeed all three.
This thinking and fantasing not only adds more pressure to go for relief but also creates a desire to write things down - plans, fantasies, wishes etc. Of course bothering Mistress with unwanted and excessive communications as She goes about Her day is not a good plan. i actively speak when spoken to in this at the moment!! So, this blog format gives me that outlet and an opportunity to note my thinking as each day ticks over.
i have an appointent with Mistress on Friday - i genuinely do not know what is in store for me, as She plans and delivers the sessions how She sees fit in order for my progression towards ownership. i do know it will be all of painful, fun, sadistic, fair, safe, mind blowing and more, it always is. Will i be allowed to cum or even forced to cum is totally Her decision, as is what happens after if i do get a release.
So as Friday approaches these thoughts and questions will play over and over, mixed with wishful thinking and certain fantasies will simply put me into a vicious circle of frustration and pressure. To which i am determined to succeed and not touch at all...:)
No comments:
Post a Comment