Xmas session

So as we head in to December i head for the last session of the year with Miss next week, bringing back fond memories of last years Christmas session.

It was my first ever serving Miss in a domestic session, where She beat me, drugged me, nailed me and allowed me a non ruined orgasm for the fist time as a Christmas gift from Her.

Up until that point, and indeed every time since when Miss Suzanna has extracted my orgasm from me, She has ruined it in some way.

5 of my last 6 orgasms i have been made to lick back up, with Miss actually catching 3 of them and pouring the whole spunky mess back down my throat.

The 6th one, although perhaps not technically ruined Miss simply took it from me as i lay suspended, drugged with a re-breather mask on, helpless and speechless as i concentrated on breathing whilst She extracted my cum.

So full feeding my spunk back to me is Her current favourite way of ruination it seems, but over the last 22 months Miss has probably chosen abandonment more times than any other, as Her way of ruining me. This is normally preceded by numerous merciless edging which has me a trembling, frustrated mess, putty in Her hands. More often than not Miss abandons me at the crucial point of orgasm before, scooping my spunk up and forcing me to lick my mess from Her fingers.

Post orgasm torture has featured on Her array of deliciously cruel ruining techniques. So has forcing a second sample immediately after the first, continued milking, forced to cum while chastised, beating my balls as i cum - either by hand beating or kicking...many, many ways does Miss have of ensuring She extracts the sperm, without the enjoyment of an orgasm.

Heres hoping that this year Miss allows me just one more non-ruined orgasm..........i wont hold my breath...:) xx

the most elite champange

Champagne

Its fair to say i had not enjoyed too much champagne drinking prior to devotion and indeed until the start of 2019. Miss Suzanna also acknowledging early on in O/our journey that relieving Oneself in slave company is something to build up to.

To be fair, i was first exposed to Her nectar in July 18, duly saturated from the source as i lay blindfolded in a bath, prior to going for lunch. 

my second exposure, and my very first taste of champagne was in Her dungeon, whilst tied to a chair and i was allowed a few teasing sips during O/our session.

However it was a filming duty in early 2019 where the watersports levels began to be ramped up with a huge kick start in Derby. Whilst on set, and as cameraman, Miss presented me with a fresh cup of produce, and instructed me to drink it. This was infront of 7 or 8 other people. It was delightfully degrading. i of course sipped and enjoyed my drink as i filmed Her dominating Her filming slaves in the day.

Since that day i have taken Miss’s golden nectar several more times and in different ways and circumstances…..which all drive slightly different sentiments and receptors.

When it is taken cold – Maybe taken during session, or like at Derby whilst carrying out other activities for Miss it brings on a more prolonged period of humiliation. Sipping the golden nectar cold just reinforces my servitude to Her and my willingness to drink for Her. i have generally taken it like this when Miss has other activities to get on with, so She allows me to drink at my pace.....but it all needs to be consumed.

Taken warm – Obviously freshly delivered, the warm drink has a slightly different texture….and when Miss glares at me ensuring I drink it all adds to that degradation.

This is when Miss effectively forces me to consume Her nectar in Her timescale....which generally is very short. Gulping all of Her liquid down, nice and warm gives me a more degraded feel as Her beautiful eyes watch me drink Her.

  

In public - One of the ultimate humiliations for me is when i am allowed to drink Champagne in public, especially if its the only drink i am allowed and Miss is enjoying a more traditional drink.

i have had the honour of doing this which again ensured i feel submissive when in public to my Mistress. This could be taken to another level, if W/we were ever eating out and my glass was filled with Her golden liquid as Miss's was filled with real champagne.

From the source – at Oubliete but not really sure who i was drinking from as Miss had invited two of Her friends to use me as their toilet too. That day i drank 3 Mistress's champagne, as it was all mixed together and individually from the source...it was just an extremely humiliating experience, but one that has me craving to drink from the source again. 

Miss has threatened to do this, so I in no doubt it is in Her plans for the future and will be a proper honour to try and consume it all. i am imagining a relentless stream of Her hot liquid as i try to gulp it all inside of me.

Finally a true fantasy of mine would be to be Miss's exclusive toilet for the day, each and every time She wants to go She simply uses my throat as Her toilet, using me whenever She desires.

One fantasy I have is to drink all of Her water during a day – so each time She wants to go, I have to swallow it all and flush for Her.

cum eating, for Miss Suzanna

Hello...:)

So this blog is an edited version of one that was up for only a week or so. Why edited? Because of the degrading and humiliating events of O/our last session, when Miss made me eat spunk again.......and not my own! So the ending has been changed...;)

Miss Suzannas latest clip on Her C4S store has inspired me to finally note down my thoughts on the subject of cum eating.

And lets face it its humiliating at best, tastes disgusting and there is something simply not right about being made to swallow ones own cum.

i have lost count of the number of times Miss Suzanna Maxwell has made me lick my filth off Her fingers. It has been common practice in our time together when Miss extracts my orgasm for Her to ensure She has it on Her fingers and for me to lick them clean.....ensuring i taste my own seed after orgasm.

So as i am sat here on Suzanna Sunday, extremely horny and with a vibrating butt plug inside me to do my stretching exercises its a opportune time to write.

As i said its normal practice now for me to lick my spunk from Miss's fingers after She has taken another orgasm from me. i dont like it, but i am resigned to the fact that as long as Miss owns me and my orgasms then She will deal with the outcome as She wants, its Her choice.

As humiliating as that is i am always thankful that the saving grace is the quantity doesnt feel overwhelming - the taste is disgusting and i still feel extremely small as this beautiful Woman is recycling my seed back into me.

A notable occasion was when Miss was with Her kinky friend Miss Ruby. i was to accompany them on a night out, but before we left for the night Miss felt the need to empty my balls before we went out.

i was taken upstairs by these two beautiful Women and forced to strip, when i was hogtied on the bed and blindfolded. The two dominant Women toyed with me for a while before leaving me to return down stairs. i remain hogtied, naked and blindfolded as i could hear them talking and laughing downstairs.
After what seem like an eternity i sensed the two Women return - where by they toyed with me again. This time Miss began to edge me. This is something She does very, very well and very cruelly (blog on this most frustrating and exhausting of activities sometime soon).

After Miss had had Her fun of taking me to the edge of climax a few times with me begging fruitlessly for a release, She finally allowed it and She emptied Her balls all over my stomach.
Miss then delighted in scooping it up and rubbed in into my face whilst making me lick it off Her fingers. The two Ladies then returned downstairs to leave me again, but this time with a face full of drying cum and its taste on my tongue to remind me of my place.

i was allowed to accompany these two Ladies that evening, drained of cum ensuring my submission.

The footjob in 'a feast from My feet' was not the first time i had been made to lick my cum from Her feet, although it was my first time being forced to cum by Her feet.

In another hot clip, "worship then wank" i am filmed worshipping Miss Suzannas amazing stocking clad legs. Miss will allow me a release on condition that i can hold out until Her count of 31 and i cum on Her feet and eat it off them. Now i love nylon...the sight, the touch, the feel and even the sound of Miss in stockings is to die for.

my sticky mess was easily visible against the black of Her nylon and eating my cum off the nylon was a delight, even if it was the same disgusting taste.

Thankfully Miss was bare legged as She used her feet to drain me in the a feast from My feet clip. Imagine the pain of a nylon foot job..............like sand paper!!

Anyway, in this clip my semen is extracted once more and i am made to cum on Her feet, then without wasting no time, and before it went cold Miss made me lick it all off Her delectable toes.

As i say, She has feed me my cum countless ways, and as humiliating as licking from Her fingers or toes is, making me drink all of it is a whole different level.

Thankfully, She has so far only made me do this once. It was in session, again with Miss Ruby in attendance.

It was at the very start of the session, i was naked before these two, both dressed in stunning matching black lingerie i was already in submissive heaven.

Miss cuffed me and hoisted my wrists in to the air allowing full and undefended access to my cock and balls for whatever They preferred. Miss was straight up "We are going to milk you into this glass and pour it down your throat" - oh god.....!

There was no edging, no play just a forced erection from these two blonde Goddesses. Miss Ruby probing Her fingers into my back and massaging the balls to encourage that sperm. Miss Suzanna meanwhile gets into Her perfect hand rhythm that gives me no defence against the erection.

The milking continues without stopping, and i get closer and closer to cumming. i cant help it, i certainly cant prevent it as Miss relentlessly goes after that orgasm. As i get close the thoughts of me swallowing my own full load cancel out any niceties applied to being allowed to cum and soon the inevitably eruption into the glass and the realisation of what is going to happen next.

i had been chastised for 14 days so Miss extracted all that spunk and ensured the glass was emptied and all 14 days worth going down my throat.....this was probably the most humiliated i had felt so far in our journey.

So Miss has only fed it to me once, but She has made me drink it twice more if i recall correctly on my own as punishment for breaking Her rules. Now this is humiliating....!! being made to release in to a glass, drink it and send Her video evidence of me doing it........yuk..! i try to stick to the rules now..:)

So if drinking my own spunk is bad enough even more humiliating is eating another mans load. Miss has forced me to do this three times now.

The first time was again filming, this time in Derby and following an intense period of chastity, where Miss actually had my key for three days. Knowing that She had it is a different feeling altogether, its special.

Anyway, this was effectively day 2 and i had been released from chastity for a bukkake scene where i was required to cum over another slave face before being returned to chastity......so thankfully i was fairly empty when it came to my milking.

Miss's friend Mistress Inka expertly tied me star shaped to the bed and Miss began Her task of extracting my cum, whilst chastised.

Whilst i knew Mistress Inka and Miss Ruby were also extracting cum from Their slaves i did not know they would catch it all in one glass.....the same glass that i would be milked into before Miss Suzanna tipped the whole 3 loads into my throat, and ensuring i swallowed the lot.

i love this shot of Miss Suzanna and Mistress Inka looking very contented after making me drink the three loads of semen.

This single humiliating act was a defining moment in our journey as it cemented my trust in Miss. We had never spoken of forced cum eating, or eating another mans sperm - if She would have asked me i  would have passed, but She said 'trust Me'....i did and She created an environment in which She could get it done and without going anywhere near breaking me.

Secondly, the night Miss Suzanna cuckolded me. This was an altogether off the scale experience which ended with the same, spunk eating result for me.

Miss Suzanna's husband cock, having just pleasured Her.

This time, although just as humiliating, was something extra, as it was from Miss Suzannas special Man, in a unique occasion. His spunky mess was indeed entwined with Miss very special and sacred liquid, the cocktail of both of Their cum feed to me in an symbolic session was a different feeling.

immediately after being fed some spunk and  if you look closely you will see some of His cum on my lip.

i have not met Mistress's Man, only swallowed His load, and i am sure it will not be my last time.

In the run up to O/our September session Miss Suzanna had dropped a couple of hints that She will feed me Her mans spunk again, hot and/or cold......:/ Clearly i hoped She was just teasing or that She would forget or it would be in the future or something.

The session started with me naked except for my collar - Miss was fully clothed in Her everyday wear. The CFNM situation ensures submission in it self. The She sat me on a chair blindfolded and locked me in a brutal chastity device as She began Her teasing and tormenting of me.

This teasing and tormenting climaxed with me eating Miss's lovers cum for the second time. This time is was cold and pungent. As She brought the spunky spoon close to me i smelt Him - it was then i knew i was to be made to eat cum once more. 'Open your mouth' She commanded and simply fed it to me with a spoon....i have never before felt submission like it....The degrading, humiliating feat of being force fed cold sperm has driven my submission to Miss Suzanna deeper than i thought possible.

Including my own filth, thats four men's samples Miss has coerced me into drinking. Its all disgusting and horrid tasting, and forced bi is certainly not my thing in any shape or form, but there is a different feeling about tasting Miss's own Lover.

flash

Originally Published on

9/9/19, 2:36 PM

Pacific Daylight Time

Deleted 16:00 12th Sept 2019

cleaning Miss Suzanna feet.

March 2018 was when i began my devotion to Miss and to try to earn the right to become Hers and be collared by Her.

It was also the date i gave up over control of my orgasms to Miss Suzanna. Since that date Miss has controlled and owned them. Permitting them on Her terms as She toys and plays with me.

When i am not in Her presence She keeps me chastised, normally allowing me to release once per week but forcing me to masturbate whilst worshipping an image of video of Her for a limited time each night. This keeps me submissive and compliant and also brings frustration and torment.

When in Her presence, either for filming or session it remains Her call as Miss decides, when, where and how She will empty the balls She absolutely controls.

Most of the time i end up licking my disgusting filthy mess off Her fingers and like wise most of my orgasms end up ruined in some way.

So it was Miss Suzanna's latest clip - a feast from My feet - which got me to scribe this short blog as it was the first time She has used Her perfect feet to milk me. In fact, as She goes onto say in this hot clip, its the first time She has milked any submissive with Her feet. Of course i felt highly honoured, even as i was cleaning my mess off Her pretty toes with my tongue after She had forced my orgasm.

i do love to kiss Miss's feet and particularly suck Her toes....and as a preference without my cum all over them..:)

Although this was my first time being milked by Her feet, its not the first time i have been privileged enough to cum over them.
Of course, the end result was the same as i was made to wank myself off them, following my worship of Her.
That time Her pretty feet were wrapped in nylon, my cum glistening on Her black stockings before She rammed them into my mouth to clean my mess off Her. Thankfully there was no milking using Her nylon clad feet that day or that would have been painful...:)

As an aside i have noticed Miss refers to my cum as "spunk"...im finding this a real turn on to hear Her talk like this -

i feel the need of a cum eating blog soon, just jotting down my thoughts on this humiliating task Miss insist i perform.

i will see if i can tot up how many orgasms She has taken from me, and how many times She has ruined them etc.

Its a careful balance Miss uses to exert Her power and control over me. Milking me and emptying Her balls ensures i am submissive and compliant where as not allowing my release builds frustration and torment and a long or repeated edging ratchets up that frustration and torment several levels.

another little milestone...?????

Ever since the start of our journey, i have always wondered what it would be like to be that sub, in Miss Suzanna's company on the first morning following one of Her little personal vanilla breaks...when She has that itch to get back to kink and beat someone...!

Well this may very well come true on Wednesday...:)

Clearly, im not privvy to Her diary, so when i found out on Thursday that She was away for a long weekend, and i am booked in to session with Her on Wednesday, then my little itch may just be satisfied......thats if Wednesday is Her first day back of course...;)

Various techniques of control

so i have been sat here working away for Miss on various items all morning, chastised and forbidden to play as i watch clips and images, my erection swells and drops and the frustration is at a high right now!

its my own fault too...i have just watch a video of O/our last session, where Miss took me which ever way She wanted - on my knees, on my back, fast, slow, deep...even leaving the cock inside me for me to fuck myself as She watched and drugged me......any way thats for another time...right now my cock is rock hard and i am dying to worship Her..:)

So, in my predicament i need something to do with my hands an that is just note a few thought on how Miss controls me.

Firstly, obviously She renamed me, i am simply just called flash.

She keeps me chastised, allowing me a release only once per week following full worship of Her. This keeps me compliant, devoted and eager to remain so for Her.

Milking - again a regular milking, normally ruined in some way, keeps me in total submission and compliance as Her balls are drained and empty.

She regularly mounts me, removing any masculinity i think i may have. Sometimes this is as i am bent over a bench and secured with no where to go as She enters me. Other times it is on a bed on my back, my Mistress commanding eye contact as She penetrates me. The humiliation ensures devotion.

She drugs me, which usually sends me deeper into Her sub space ensuring my eyes water, lips tremble and i have no control over my mind or body....Hers to do as She pleases with them.

Intimidation - with Her eye contact - i cant cope with it, but She uses this so effectively to assert and maintain Her dominance over me.

Beatings - Miss beats me appropriately....it always hurts and i always try to take it for Her, with an aspiration to take more - i currently wear Her marks as a result of a recent caning.

Pain - Miss loves to dish out pain - Her cock and balls being favourite for torment at the moment.

Tease and torment - Miss conducts this perfectly, through voice, body and soul...when She chooses, i am putty in Her hands.

Humiliation - various methods used, from making me drink my own cum to forced bi to occasional public humiliation.

OK i need a cold shower, but they are just some of the techniques Miss Suzanna uses to control and own me.....which She does.

the forced bi-ness

Ok, so like buses, no blog from me for months then two in two weeks..:) in fact, as long as i have something to write about i now fully intend to be more regular.

i am no writer though, neither do i want to be.....i just love writing from the heart, as i feel it, or the ideas come to me.

So my idea for this blog was to be 'secret'..a way of me communicating with Miss on wider subjects, for Her to read as and when (of even if) She wants to, without bombarding Her with emails. we all know the dangers of over communicating in life in general, and i am certainly not that person.

So, with that in mind, there will be no fan fare when i blog, its just there mainly for Miss to read, but as you are part of the journey too, then i am delighted you took the time to read my scribe.

This time, i just thought i would wax about my forced bi experiences.

Firstly, these were zero before i met Miss Suzanna. i have not even ever considered the thought of bisexual interaction before....no way siree..i do love the idea of filming with other males involved, body contact etc not a problem.....but sexual stuff.....never entered my little brain.

It was clear from the outset that to earn my collar, i would be required to prove myself to Miss by completing Her set tasks. i did try to wheedle out of Miss what these task would be, but She was better than that and remained silent..:)

Approximately halfway through my devotion and yearning to earn that collar, on September 7th 2018, i was required to attend to a double Mistress session as this was something else that was on the list of activities i was required to complete.

Double Mistress sessions was not a new concept for me, but this would be my first with my potential owner...if i passed of course.

i have reviewed the session previously, so i wont go there but towards the end i was bound to the cross very securely. Miss Marks and Miss Suzanna were looking very excited before Miss left the room, returning with another naked slave on a lead behind Her.

This was to be my first forced bi experience........and i had no idea!

Now let me context forced...yes it is/was, as it's not my choice; but is consensual, such is the trust, knowledge, understand my Mistress and i have, i consent to anything She wants....because i trust Her to push me, but not break me.

Anyway, earlier in the session Miss had already forced one orgasm from me (and ruined it by pouring it down my throat) so when the other slave took me in his mouth, i knew he would have a challenge. Not wanting to disappoint and fail, i focused on the two blonde Mistresses infront of me, rather than the man who was now sucking my cock for the very first time.

Focus as i might, Miss's slave could not get me hard...i was forced to wank myself and cum on his face.....Miss would decide later if my collar was still an option.

So my take on this is strangely although i had failed, i did not 'dislike' the situation, and would consent to, but not request (!) a forced bi situation again. Apparently i said this to Miss in Derby......She remember and would not wait too long to test me again with my cock in another mans mouth.

So, Derby. This was a huge moment for me, as it was the time i put my trust, whole heartily in to Miss, at the blink on an eye....or heart beat.

So my considered next forced bi situation was during the filming of "The milking of Our stable"

There was no interaction as such, as i was secured to the bed. But this was my first time i had tasted another mans spunk, but it was not one but two other male subs had been milked into that glass before i was forced to cum in chastity into the same glass and the whole mixture poured down my throat! A totally ruined orgasm for me!:)

i did hear Miss whispering to Miss Mark and Miss Inka prior to the scene, i could not hear what about though. But following their plotting Miss turned to me and said "flash, you just need to trust Me". That i did, and that i still do to this day.

Third time was the cuckold situation.

OK so there definitely was no interaction here and my sight and hearing were removed.

However i was again forced to taste and swallow another mans load, this time it was from Miss' husband following His love making with Miss...what an great honour this was.

Again, i knew nothing about it, nothing about the cuckold plan until She told me as i was bound, drugged and immobile, and She was awaiting Her lover.

After She had enjoyed Him, She fed me His cum from Her fingers, which was clearly entwined with Her very own most sacred and holy of fluids.

i love the photos Miss took after this, look carefully and there is still a little bit of Her lovers cum on the corner of my mouth..;)

The fourth time was very recent. W/we were on set shooting for Her store, and prior to one scene...She simply turned to me and said "mushroom is going to suck your cock on this one".

The feeling i had was simply "yes Miss" - again it was; unexpected, forced but consensual, surprising with my willingness to not disappoint. This time i was sucked to an erection, with mushroom leaving me hard for Miss to finish the orgasm extraction as She expertly does.

So there is still no way i would say to Miss i want to do bi sexual things in our next monthly session.

But, the great advantage of investing the time, money and effort into each other is that She knows me so well...my boundaries, hard limits, soft limits, places She has not taken me yet places She wants to take me too.

i have no doubt a 5th forced bi situation will happen......i know not when, where, with whom and how but it will definitely be forced, as it still ins't my choice, however it will be consensual as i trust Miss Suzanna 1000%.

thank you for reading..xxx